DRIVE ANGRY (2011)

It’s The Crow meets Death Proof, but without the cool Violent Femmes songs or Tarantino’s snappy dialogue . . .

Nicolas Cage – looking increasingly like a sex offender in each movie he appears lately – plays Milton (geddit?), a man who escapes from Hell Itself (TM) in a ‘Seventies muscle car to avenge the death of his daughter at the hands of a satanic cult and rescue his granddaughter.

In the process he also prevents the cult from opening the gates of Hell Itself (TM). He is pursued by a supernatural being simply known as “The Accountant” played by William Fichtner, the only person who seems to be having any fun in the movie.

Trying hard to emulate a 1970s exploitation – or “grindhouse” - movie, Drive Angry is filled with loads with gory violence, gratuitous female nudity and cussing. But this makes it sounds more interesting than it really is.

Overall the acting is tepid and Cage is clearly only collecting his paycheck so that he can pay his back taxes (does he actually even read any of the scripts he says yes to nowadays?). The screenplay displays the same wit as the yellow “I Break 4 Pussy” adorning the back of Cage’s car in the flick, i.e. none and the movie is filled with unlikable and unpleasant characters.

The movie’s absolute low point comes at the half-hour mark in which Cage dispatches a bunch of his attackers whilst copulating with a diner waitress, a scene stolen straight from 2007’s Shoot ‘em Up actioner starring Clive Owen and Monica Bellucci. If you’re going to plagiarize other movies we say that you should at least steal from a much older ones which everyone has forgotten!

WORTH IT? Only if you find “I Break 4 Pussy” bumper stickers entertaining.