Something the werewolves left behind for us on the rug . . .
STARRING: Landon Liboiron, Lindsey Shaw, Ivana Milicevic
Directed by: Joe Nimziki
WHAT’S IT ABOUT?
In this reboot of the ’80s horror classic, Landon Liboiron of Terra Nova stars as high school senior Will Kidman, whose infatuation with a beautiful classmate (Lindsey Shaw of’ Pretty Little Liars and 10 Things I Hate About You) begins to trigger certain teenage animal instincts. But when a mysterious woman (Ivana Milicevic of Casino Royale) with a shocking secret re-enters his life, Will learns that he is heir to a powerful line of werewolves. Now he finds he has a choice to make: succumbing to his primal nature or turning against his own. In order to fight the destiny of his legacy and save the girl of his dreams, he must battle not only his growing blood lust but an army of fearsome beasts hell-bent on killing us all. Tonight, the full moon rises. The horror begins anew.
Here’s a movie that starts out dumb and gets dumber by each flickering frame or transferred pixel or whatever . . .
Intended as a reboot of the Howling werewolf horror “franchise” from the 1980s, The Howling: Reborn were probably sold to investors as “hey, it’ll do for werewolves what Twilight did for vampires and make oodles of money.”
Except, no, it didn’t. It went straight to DVD even though the Syfy channel and all its crappy “originals” are probably the best home for it.
The plot involves a Peter Parker clone at high school played by Landon Liboiron (the teenager from Terra Nova) finding out that he is actually a werewolf. Plus he is somehow part of a plot by his long-lost MILF mother and a werewolf pack to take over the world. Or something like that. Thrown into the mix is a potential girlfriend (Lindsey Shaw) who might or might not also be a werewolf.
The plot idiocies pile up exponentially: a high school with more high-tech security lockdown than your average Bond villain’s lair; a husband who doesn’t recognize his long-lost wife even as she drags him to bed; a lead character who doesn’t know the names of the kids who have been in his class throughout his entire high school career; school kids who somehow manages to broadcast their “emergency message” on all TV channels across the planet; a high school graduation ceremony without any parents present; and much much more.
Wisely the werewolves are kept off-screen for most of the movie. Unwisely we get see them for the finale and boy! Are they cheesy! Difficult to believe that this a supposed off-shoot of the original Howling movie, which got all kinds of accolades along with American Werewolf in London back in 1981.
None of the movie’s investors seem to have read the script it seems. Or they must have shrugged that “it’s crap alright, but it’s got photogenic teens in it, so it’s OK.” In fairness it worked for the Twilight movies but they at least had a modicum of professionalism that seems to elude Howling: Reborn.
Plot idiocies sink this low-budget werewolf flick and you’re much better off checking out any average episode of Supernatural instead.